Trophies for Just Participating

I keep seeing these Facebook 'shares':

I'm afraid of a world run by kids who were never spanked and who got trophies for just participating.


I've discussed the spanking before.  It turns out it doesn't work for my kids.  And it was just a product of my own uncontrolled fear and anger.

So, if you want MY opinion on that: I'm afraid of a world run by kids whose parents disciplined them with uncontrolled fear and anger.

Now on to the trophies.

My kids don't get trophies.  They don't get awards.  I sat through 2 hours of Sam's 6th grade recognition (like a graduation, you got the hot gym and the crying babies and the incessant speeches, but no gowns.)  I noticed the same 5 kids getting all of the awards.  Over and over.

They are good kids.  I know some of them and they are great.  I really like them.

But they get recognized when they're great (the star of the play, the soloist in band, the athlete that wins the game) and then they get recognized again and again for having been so great.

But my kid, who performs a miracle every day by talking, sitting in the school cafeteria, overcoming his severe anxiety issues.  There's no award for him.

The kid who lost his mom to cancer last year.  No award.

The kids who have severe ADHD and bipolar and are barely scraping by?  And whose parents have bipolar too and often live in a chaotic home.  None.

When it's easy for you?  When you have the charismatic personality and confidence and natural gifts?  The trophies roll into your lap.  These are our politicians.  They are the good looking, sweet talkers who found it came easy and parlayed that into running our country.

How's that working our for you?

Sometimes JUST participating is the miracle.  Showing up every day is a miracle.  Putting up with the grind every day whether or not your life is falling apart, your heart is breaking, or your mind and body don't work as team and make everything you are trying to do a mountain instead of a molehill.

These are the people who make our country work.  These are the people who put food on our tables.

And I think they deserve a trophy.


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