Kissing and Touching

As I become a teenager, I am becoming more interested in girls.

I hear a lot about kissing, private touching, and sex.

I see it on the computer also.

My friends talk about it too.  I think about it a lot also.

Kissing, touching, and sex are a normal part of life.  They are fun and make me feel good.

However, some things I can do now and some things I should not do until I am older.  Some things are appropriate at school, and some in private.

Before doing any of these things I should make sure that the girl I want to do them with also wants to do them with me. 

Before I kiss a girl I should follow these rules:
   1. I have known her for more than a month
   2. We talk frequently and consider each other good friends.
   3. I ask her if I can kiss her.
   4. She says yes.
   5. We are not at school during school hours.  I can kiss after school or at a dance.

Before I touch a girl on the breasts I should follow these rules:
   1. I have known her at least 6 months.
   2. We are good friends and talk frequently (at least 3 times a week.)
   3. We talk about touching and make sure we both feel comfortable with it.  If I feel uncomfortable, or she does, we will wait.
   4. We only do it in a private place.  It cannot be done at school.  It cannot be done when other people are around.

I am not ready to have sex.  I am not old enough, and my brain is not mature enough.  It will be several years before I am ready to have sex.  Sex means touching genitals with hands or mouth, touching my penis to her vagina or in her vagina.

When I am ready to have sex, I should follow these rules:
   1. I have known her at least a year.
   2. We are good friends and talk every day.
   3. We talk about sex for at least a month before we decide to do it.
   4. I agree that I am ready to have sex with her.  She agrees that she is ready to have sex with me.
   5. We talk to a doctor about how to have safe sex.   Safe sex means that I use a condom and the girl uses birth control pills.
   6. We only do it in a private place at a home.

All of these: kissing, private touching, and sex are a natural part of being a human being.  But all of these things have a time and place. 

Until I am ready to move to the next step (1st kissing, 2nd private touching, last sex) there are things I can do with a special girl friend.
   -We can talk and get to know each other better
   -We can hold hands
   -We can spend time together

My body is maturing, and I get erections and I have a lot of interest in sex.  When I am in private, I can masturbate.  This means rubbing my penis with my hand.  This can only be done in private, and it is best if I do it in the bathroom where I can be clean.  I can ask dad about how to do this.


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